Got my first apartment ALL BY MYSELF!!!!!

The divorce hit me pretty hard. Not only did I lose my husband and best friend, but I also lost the place I called home for 2 years. The apartment that I painted and decorated every single room perfectly to fit our personalities. The place I planned to hold Thanksgiving in and held my first dinner party with a few friends.

When my ex decided that he didn’t want to be married anymore, he took more from me then he knew. I was sent to live back with my parents who had no rooms available for me. I slept on a couch in the living room and had only a laptop to escape the world. I lost my privacy and a small piece of me when I moved back in with my parents.

My friend, Becca, told me the best words of advice that anyone could give me.

Becca: “You need to move out of your parent’s house and get a place of your own.”
Me: “What if I can’t afford it, then I will feel like a failure again. I think I will save up more money and then go from there.”
Becca: “You need to get out there and struggle in a small roach infested apartment. You need to live off Roman noodles and not be taken care of.”

With her kind words of advice I had the courage to go forward and start looking for an apartment. I figured out what I could afford and knew I wanted to live close to my parents. After looking at just 1 other apartment, I found the perfect one.

Yes it was a little bit more then I wanted to spend, but it was a mansion to me. Being only 5 minutes away from the house where I grew up in. I knew the area and I the apartment was HUGE! I put in an application and held my breath for news. Then I got a call that changed my life!

I GOT THE APARTMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had no furniture and no idea what I was doing. But I went in the and just laid on the floor on my new place soaking it all in. I could not believe I was doing this!

I quickly furnished my apartment with furniture that I liked and decorated it to fit MY personality. This place has helped me heal more then anything. I am so proud of myself for taking this next step in my life. I take pride in the fact that I have moved out in a fresh new place and my ex is sitting in an apartment that has echoes of me all through it. My new furniture has no memory of our relationship. Just the memory that I am a strong woman who can get through anything thrown at me.

Just so you know. I am not living in a roach infested apartment eating Roman noodles. But I am starting to see how hard it is to live on my own and appreciate what has been giving to me. Even though I plan to only stay here a few years, I will always remember my first time living all on my own.

Moved into my first apartment!

Today I became a strong, independent woman.

Today I signed the lease of my very own apartment!!

That’s right, kids. No parents, no man in my life and no roommates. It is just going to be me, myself and I living in this great big space.

I knew the second I saw the apartment online that I loved it. It was open, clean and only about 5 minutes away from my family. So if I had any problems I was never far from home. I knew the neighborhood and the area was very friendly. Plus it is safe part of town. A perfect place where I didn’t need to worry about walking to my car at night or making sure the door was triple locked.

The first day I had my apartment, I had no furniture to go in it. I just laid out the carpet I bought and just took it all in. My first real place! I am so proud of myself!

Let me take you on a tour.

Here is the door to my first apartment!!! #11

See how open it is as soon as you open the door?

My dinning room which I actually don’t use at all. It’s more for a place to put trash ready to go out.

The shelf that divides the 2 rooms is perfect for keep all my pictures.
My fantastic kitchen!!! I love this kitchen and all the appliances are brand new!

My bathroom. It is nice and spacious. Not crazy over the color but I am not going to be here forever.

My LARGE bedroom!! Not very decorated but I got to choose the bed and covers. Nobody else had a say, just me!

My enormous closet. A large part of why I wanted this place. So much room I can’t even fill it…. wait I am sure I can.

The community backyard with a public pool!!

Thank you for visiting. I am sure I am going to have some great memories here.

Went on a hike in the snow and cold!

I was supposed to go skiing today (something I NEVER did) but due to the stinky economy, it was cancelled. :(

So a group got together to do a hike in the trails of Lowell. I believe it was a total of 10 miles. I was pretty excited about going because I heard that there was a planned trip to AZ to hike the Grand Canyon! How fun would that be!! So I figured that if I could manage this hike, I could train myself to complete the 26 mile Grand Canyon hike.

I had nothing to wear for this hike. So I went to Sports Etc. and bought really nice waterproof boots, pants (which ended up not fitting), a jacket and a backpack. I certainly looked like a hiker. I was all set!

We start the hike early morning, about 8am. It was freezing and snowy. I fell twice on patches of ice which wasn't too fun because I had so much in my backpack that I just feel like a ton of bricks. No one told me that I shouldn't wear brand new hiking boots without breaking them in, so my feet where developing huge blisters. I also had a hard time catching up with everyone.

It turns out that I may have looked like I knew what I was doing, but in reality I was too out of shape for this. This small hike kicked my ass. It didn't just kick my butt, it also knocked me down and proceeded to beat me up. It was so hard! I guess I wasn't in that great of shape. But considering this was my first real hike, I thought I did really well. I managed to get through most of it without passing out and dieing. So yay for me!

The group. I am the last one on the right. The shorty of the group. We were actually standing on a pond that was iced over. I believe this was halfway through our hike, so about 3 miles in. I was ready to go home and take off those darn boots.

Details

Lowell-Dracut-Tynsboro Walking Trail- This is good for people that are in decent shape. Lots of rocks, hills and branches to look out for. I wouldn't go when there is snow and ice on the ground again.

Went to my first Bruins Game

I have NEVER been to the Garden/Fleet/TD-BankNorth Garden to see the Bruins play. I don't even own any shirts with the Bruins logo on them. So when I got invited to a free game from my ex-sister-in-law, I couldn't turn it down.



Since I didn't want to be the only one in the place without Bruins gear, I went with my Ex SIL to Models and bought a really nice Bruins hoodie and the Saint Patrick's day edition Bruins shirt. Can I just say this shirt is awesome!! The white part has little shamrocks that glitter!!

So we get to the Fleet (that's what I grew up calling it) and I was starving!! My Ex SIL did not believe me when I said that there was food courts upstairs so we ate at a crappy McDonald's. Since I was dieting, I only had a small chicken sandwich.


We get upstairs to go to our seats and what did we see? Food courts EVERYWHERE! I was slightly mad but got over it. We found our seats and actually had a really good view of the rink. We were playing against the Flyers. There was a ton of Flyer fans at the game.


I know that Boston fans are considered the biggest jerks but let me tell you, the Flyer fans we sat near where not very nice. They made fun of the way we talk and said some mean things to random Bruins fans. It p- me off that they came to our home town and where bashing us. It made watching the game no fun.


We ended up losing pretty bad. I really have a hard time following hockey since it is so fast paced, but it was an experience. I didn't take many pictures during the game, but I did manage to get one shot of me in the seats.

***WARNING *** WARNING *** WARNING***

The following picture of me is horrible!! This was a time of my life that I didn't care what I looked like and it shows in the picture!! I was not wearing any make-up and my hair looks like I rolled out of bed. I wanted to post it though to prove that 1) I was actually at the game 2) To one day see how far I have come in my life.

OH MY!!! I look like crap! Please keep in mind that I was going through a divorce and hanging out with my EX SIL!!! I had some pretty bad circles under my eyes! I love how thick and uneven my eyebrows look...NOT! At least I can say the game was good...oh wait.

Details

The Official Site of the Boston Bruins: Where you can buy tickets or learn more about the Bruins

Saint Patrick's Day Edition Bruins T-shirt: Super cute!!

I volunteered to feed the homeless.

Early 2009 was a tough time for me. I had separated with my husband and was living back home. I was pretty miserable at this time. I lost my apartment, my large comfy bed, the couch we got for free from Jordan's just by the Sox winning the World Series, a 52 inch flat screen tv (brand new too) and my kitchen. I moved back in with my parents with just a laptop and boxes filled with my personal items. I had no friends by my side, thank god for my family. The one thing that hurt the most was not being able to take my fish tank with me. There was just no room and a large cat at my families house to bring it with me. I slept on a couch in the living room and lost my privacy.



I needed to do something with my life. My sister then told me about Soulfood. It was a group from her church that volunteers to feed the homeless in Boston. So I decided to give it a try. Besides I like helping people out.

My sister brought me to her church to prep for Soulfood. We made sandwiches, snack bags and sorted though clothes that where donated. I met a lot of great people that night.

At 7am on Saturday, we all loaded the car and made our way to Boston common. This was the line waiting for a sandwich.

There I am passing out toiletries next to my sister. You can see that it was windy that day. All I could think was that in a few hours I would be in a nice warm house while these people where going to be sleeping on the street. it was heartbreaking.

Despite the fact that they had just the clothes on their backs, they were so happy to receive a sandwich and someone to listen to them.

Being with these people made me realize that my life was not that bad. Every night I had a warm place to sleep.I never went hungry. I had clean clothes. A stable job. I never had to worry if it was going to rain outside. My life was pretty darn good.

Details

Soulfood- their website. They are more then happy to receive any donations that come alone. My sister is one of the leaders so I know that they will be taken care of.

Was set free

On this day, my husband and best friend for 8 years, told me he didn't want to be with me anymore. The reason? He was bored and wanted to be with more than one woman and experience more in his life.

Basically he wanted the Tucker Max life.

Nice.

This is kind of how I felt in pictures:

I always thought that we could get through everything. We had some many obstacles that we overcome. Yes, we fought from time to time but we always made up and always were a team. When we got married our team was weak. It became very one sided. I was doing all the hard work to keep the team a team and he doing what he could to make himself stronger. I did dishes, laundry and made hot dinners. He played hockey, went to the gym and took scuba lessons. I was told money was tight so I didn't do things that I wanted. I was all about him. What a dumbass I was!

This is when he told me to basically pack up my life and leave. That's right, I got kicked out. This was the worst day of my life.


So I left my nest that I have known for eight years and headed out to the real world. Thank god for my family or I would have never got by. During the first few months, I cried myself to sleep at night. Painful sobs at least once a day. The kind that hurts your chest.

This was how I was most of the time at work and at home. I was in a serious funk. I looked like crap. I had no friends, I didn't wear makeup, and I just stopped caring. If I was faced with death I would probably have accepted it.

But then I realized something. Johnny was thriving. He was going on in his life. Why can't I? So I either need to spread my wings and fly or fall to the ground and die. I needed to make a decision. So what did I decide to do?That's right, I spread those wings open and begin to live. I was taking back my life. I was going to make it!

Then I got really pissed at what he did and decided that I needed to have what I deserved. I reconnected with some old friends, joined a gym and created a bucket list of everything I ever wanted to do. I wasn't going to let him destroy me. I am a fighter and I am going to live life to the fullest.

Things that helped me through this tough time

My Family

They did everything they could to make me happy and comfortable. Even though they don't have much, they gave me everything I needed. I thought it would be hard to go back home but after 5 minutes I felt like I never left.

Becca

She spent countless hours hanging out with me during this time. She has been my friend for 18 years. She would be the first person who would help me egg his house.

My Close group of Friends

After reconnecting with them after 8 years, they make me feel like I have never left. The are the reason why I am stronger. I used to wear my wedding band everyday until I went to my first party with these guys. It never went back on. They have pushed me to do things I never did and have made me experience life again.

My Co-workers

Even though they didn't find out about the separation for 6 months, once they found out I have received nothing but supportive. They are all on Team Laurie

Grace Chapel

I met some GREAT people there who listened to me vent and got me out of the house

McDonald's

Comfort food knew just how to make me feel better

Red Sox

For keeping my mind busy

My Credit Card

Two words: Retail Therapy

Watched a historic election

I do now want to go on in this post about politics. Mostly this is due to the fact that I know very little about them. I just knew that America was not doing too good. We were in the need for a major change.

Then Barack Obama came. He seemed to bring new ideas and hope for our country. People who never voted before were now inspired to vote. He seemed to inspire me to get more involved with what was going on in my country. Barack seemed to make people actually interested in politics.

Oh yea, did I mention that he was black too.

That’s right. This was the first time in United States History that a black man had the chance to be elected as president. This was HUGE! I never understood why we didn’t have a black president already. It really seemed strange to me.

It was no surprise to me that Barack Obama won as our 44th president. He seemed to be what America was looking for. A change. I watched it live on TV. I have to tell you I was slightly emotional and really felt like this is what we needed. I felt like finally America has reached a new milestone.

Lets just hope that he does everything that he promised us.